Bonnie is at it again!

After a two month "sabbatical" Bonnie has decided that she would like to begin nursing again (just shy of 7mos).  So for the first time in their 6.5mos existence all three of my babies are nursing at the same time! 

When I was pregnant I wasn't sure I even wanted to nurse. After they were born I wasn't sure all of them would even be able to nurse.  If you had told me this would be my breastfeeding journey I am pretty certain I would NOT have embarked on it.  

These 6.5 months have been hard. I used pumping as a refuge when I could not face my family, my house, my other responsibilities. Pumping, as much as I had my days and weeks where I hated it, allowed me to maintain my supply and take 5+ months to get each baby to nurse.  My disdain for it fueled my desire to get those little babies to latch. There were days I could not even bring myself to put on the pumping bra. I would just sit for upwards of an hour for the strength and energy to do it.

Measuring out feedings is horrible to a mom's confidence and just brings forth doubt.  Too much. Too little. You will make them sick with that much. They won't thrive if you don't give them more. Every. Single. Time I made bottles I was unsure. 8-10 bottles a day x 3. That is too much doubt for any mom.

So, I guess now a new chapter begins. All 3 can nurse. All 3 can take bottles. And of course they all started nursing when teething began. It is a blessing because the boob is an easier soother. It's a curse because they gnaw, yank, and wrestle with it. This weekend it's just me and the babies. Taylor took the big girls to visit his family. What good timing. So I can lose sleep at night and rest during the day. When they return I will reasses.  As I am typing this I am brainstorming ways to nurse these babies, get a bit of sleep, and not got bonkers on my older three because I am sleep deprived. I think  it also means we need to connect the queen to the king bed because there is just not enough room for 3 nursing and semi mobile babies, me and Taylor (when he joins us on his days off).