Big Change 1: This morning Lucy came rushing into our room and exclaimed "Evie has a tooth that is loose." Evie has been imagining losing tooth forever. She has asked on numerous occasions to go to the dentist so he can pull out her teeth. On any other day I would have brushed it off as another made up reality but not today. She is 5.5 a loose tooth is very much a real possibility. I was excited, perhaps not as much as Lucy or Evie. 
Them as the day went on it dawned on me that she actually has a loose tooth, there will very soon be a gap in her mouth. When she got her first baby tooth i got sad because I knew her smile would never be the same. For the last 4 years or so I have grown to love her little girl smile. But in a matter of days, maybe weeks, her smile will change and it will never be the same. I'm not a huge fan of the few big teeth among baby teeth, it's such an awkward yet unavoidable stage of life. Fortunately Evie's mouth is easing me into this next phase because it's a bottom tooth.
Big change #2: Today I started weaning the babies. (Keep your opinions about that to yourself). I told myself if I could make it to a year of nursing/pumping that I would stop and that would be OK. This will likely be longest weaning process ever so as to avoid mastitis. It has been such a long, challenging, draining, exhausting, painful, journey. I am glad I pushed to get the babies to nurse but it was not easy. I am not sure I would do it all again. But I also don't know what else I would have done instead. I enjoyed seeing the babies hold hands as they nursed tandem. I giggled when the third baby would try to crawl into my lap and push a baby out of the way. I cried tears of joy when each baby latched. I also writhe in pain a significant amount of time because I have Raynauds (think sharp, burning pain during the latch and hours following).
This process is bittersweet. I have been pregnant or nursing for more than 6 years. In the early months after the babies were born I was not ready to say our family was complete. Some women just know and I envy that clarity. But as the babies have grown it has become more clear (although not yet crystal clear) that I am done. My uterus is closed. So that means no more nursing babies in my future. I likely wouldn't even be entertaining the idea of weaning if #4-6 had only been #4. She likely would have been my longest nursing child. But it's not so simple to keep nursing for sentimentality or even nutritionally when there are THREE wanting it. I know moms who extended breastfed their trio and I think it is wonderful. But it is not the right decision for me, for this season, or even for my whole family. It is time for me to take care of my body, to replenish it from the years of growing babies, of sustaining life, and providing the nourishment for 6 lives in addition to my own.
Big change 3: the babies are 2 weeks from their first birthday. Ok, so this isn't technically a change. But today we took family and 1 year photos so this has definitely been on my mind. In the midst of taking photos Bonnie clapped for the first time. All 3 babies sat up for a long time like pros. Yesterday in the tub Bonnie and Abby tried pulling up and Betsy was basically tryin to swim, head under and all.
Where are my little babies who once fit so easily 3 across in my arms? It is surreal.
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